#Gabriel Ultrakill deserves better

[luxlightly]

Legit been in a bit of a funk because like

After a millennia long lifetime of fighting, being abandoned by his creator/father/god, doing unspeakable things in the name of that Father who abandoned him and yet he never stopped loving and trying desperately to appease and do the will of, even if it meant letting the very life from his body be physically ripped out of him in an event so painful that "none of the fires of hell could compare", Gabriel finally finally, for the first time, feels true joy and has something that he wants. For first time in his thousands of years of living, finds something that makes him want to live. Only to die. Die because those who used him and manipulated his desperate devotion to the Father for centuries saw that one spark of joy in his life as something that made him impure. If V1 had killed him back in Gluttony, he would have been angry at himself for losing, but the idea he would die in the service of the Father's Will was no doubt his expectation, if he was ever to die. It wouldn't have been something he'd mourn because it's just how things are. But he has time to self reflect, to fight again, to realize that the feelings in him are passion, not hate. And he regrets his past actions and wants to atone. He wants to fix his mistakes and to grasp on to that little bit of joy he's managed to claim just for himself, for the first time. He actually wants to live, just in time to die.

Especially given the blatant "realizing you're queer after being raised in a conservative, religious upbringing" metaphor that Gabriel's entire story is, it legitimately makes me feel really bad. Don't get me wrong, it's a beautiful story, it's just a tragic one and I have too weak a heart for tragedies.

[canon-gabriel-quotes]

Transcript:

Who hell do you think you are? You’re any kind of artist? Anybody knows who you are?

Maybe everybody else wants to enjoy the peace and quiet. This is one of the most important places in North America, and who are you? Who are you? You miserable, presumptuous, no talent- you’re no artist. An artist respects the silence. It serves the foundation of creativity. 

You obviously don’t have the talent. You don’t have enough respect for yourself or other people to know what it means to respect yourself, in music or any form of creativity, and I’m an NYU film school graduate. Sucker. And the school of visual arts in the academy of art university in San Francisco.

You suck. You’re a no talent. If you really have talent go practice and then get yourself a gig instead of ruining the day for everybody down here. You disgrace. You are everything that’s gone wrong in this world. You’re a self consumed, no talent, mediocre piece of shit. And I’ve earned my right to say it, okay? In 1975, I walked Bob Dylan up on stage. Who the fuck are you? I knew the Grateful Dead from 1966.

Who the fuck are you?

You’re nothing. You are nothing. And you will never be anything. Never. How dare you? You miserable mediocre nothing. Shame on you. You crack a stupid little smile, you little pimp. Go learn to play. You’re flat. You can’t even carry a fucking note. I don’t care about your little horn lip, it doesn’t mean you know how to play. You’re flat. I’ve trained classically, I’ve trained contemporaneously, and

you suck. 

Audio source

Original video that's being referenced

[spark-circuit]

you know what's going to devastate me if it ends up happening the next time we encounter Gabriel? (continued under the cut for spoilers ✌)

if Gabriel ends up not being able to finish the fight with us.

let's be real here, as much as he's everyone's favourite golden boy, he's probably got hours left to live - maybe less by the next time we reach him. he's desperate to have one more final battle against us, not just to make up for his sins of the past, but to finally get some sense of peace and understanding for his new way of thinking, his new resolve.

so what happens if he can't. what happens if we're fighting Gabriel and maybe he hesitates on a sword swing, his strength failing him. what happens if he coughs up blood at one point. what happens if his health bar starts going down without us attacking him, him falling to one knee as he desperately tries to push himself to finish his last wish of a proper fight, because he's not done yet, he's not ready, not before he can take us down with him. out of anger? respect? righteousness? does it matter?

what if we don't even get a boss battle with him at all. we're just here to bear witness to a fallen angel.

[lordboo]

How did ur oc and Gabriel meet?

I’m assuming u mean Ariel

Gabriel and Ariel were always aware of each others existence. Gabriel being the right hand of God he was known all across heaven, whereas Ariel was a well known jester that entertained the council. He would watch her from time to time(he quite liked her shows) but after God basically vanished he noticed how cruel the council was to her(not that they weren’t before, he had only just noticed tho) they would threaten to lock her in a flesh prison if she doesn’t entertain them well enough, they would force her to embarrass herself in front of them, anything that got a kick out of them.

Gabby was disgusted with the council. This was one of the many things that broke that camels back, inevitably leading Gabriel to killing the council. In Ariel’s eyes he was her light in the dark, he was the one of the only angels that showed her respect. She soon became head over heals in love with Gabby. Gabriel isn’t exactly stupid so he caught on to this, bc Ariel kind of had no where or anyone else to turn to he let her stay with him, eventually falling in love aswell

I need to give them a ship name

pls give me suggestions

(Srry if I didn’t explain it well, I went on a tangent abit lmao)

[weirdbeancurd]

Attempted Apologies, Chapter 3- ULTRAKILL Fanfic

Chapters: 1 2 3

Ao3 (Link)

@h0ped3lusion @vallianttreedreamland (thanks for loving my work lol)

god I am SO sorry for taking so long to write this, but I've been super busy with a job, moving, and a bunch of other adult stuff. thank you all so much for being patient and leaving lovely comments. I'm not totally happy with some of this story (I'm never happy with my writing lol), so I might make minor changes, but other than that, this fic is finally done!!! thanks again for sticking around, and thank you @persi-person for helping peer review!

also I originally planned for this to be strictly platonic, but it definitely leans more into romantic territory with V1 and Gabe (and a bit with Minos and Sisyphus). it can still be seen as platonic, if that's what you'd like, though!

Takes place in an AU where the prime souls live, and Gabriel and V1 live on the surface as apocalyptic roommates. (oh my god they were roommates)

Summary: Gabriel attempts (key word: attempts) to apologize to Minos and Sisyphus for their executions, but it doesn't go as well as he had hoped. Chapter 3 out of 3.

“I, uh. Love what you did with the curtains?”

Gabriel’s feeble attempt at small talk is ignored. Breaking the ice has never been this difficult, and he's getting absolutely stone walled by the man stitching up his skin. Prestigious ruler or not, his bedside manners can use some work. He tries not to let his irritation show through his body language. I think I’d rather get my ass handed to me again over whatever this is.

“Is everything alright?”

“...”

“Look, you really don’t have to do this. I can just head back and patch mys-”

“Hold thy tongue,” Minos snaps. His mouth slams shut. He immediately drops the subject.

“Oh, um yeah. I can do that.”

He fidgets with his hands for lack of anything better to do. The loopiness from his fever is fading, his dampened healing factor working overtime to repair weary muscle. While he still had his light, Gabriel’s regeneration was enough to mend any wound in seconds. Now more than ever, he longs for that invulnerability, bestowing him confidence to the point of arrogance, reckless beyond abandon. It encased him like his shell of armor, covering incorporeal flaws. If only he could see himself now, having to rely on the tools of man and the care of another to heal. Some days, he berates his reflection. “How weak,” “how distasteful,” he thinks. “How pathetic.”

How the mighty have fallen.

His eyes flick back and forth from Minos and the floor, trying not to get caught staring. He doesn't deserve to be in their presence; a kind and noble man like him shouldn't be tainted by his darkness. Perhaps that's why Minos is being so irritable; he must be rubbing off on them. Despite the need to shy away, he spares another glance.

Gabriel's helm shields his face, but he feels naked, transparent, like the king’s iridescent skin. He sees right through them, literally and figuratively. Right through their resentment, which is held not only for Gabriel, but also for the man himself. V1 once spoke of his rage upon being liberated from the flesh prison, going as far as to describe his demeanor as “violent;” a bit ironic coming from the literal murder machine. He never thought those two words could be said in the same sentence; violence and Minos simply aren't compatible, like oil and water, fire and ice. Or so he thought.

Halfway through their battle, he grit out a single, spiteful word; “weak.” He spat it out as if it tasted vile, vicious and repulsive like acid on his tongue. And while yes, Minos despises V1 for all their kind has done to humanity, he’d never deny their skill in battle. The king was struggling to his feet, having to push off his knee to stand, frustrated that his muscles seemed to rebel against him. It's almost as if that bitterness was directed not at the machine, but instead at…

Hm. Maybe they're not so different after all.

Gabriel observes the man beside him, no longer trying to be discreet. Their shoulders are tense, whether it's from being hunched over so long or the restraint needed to not beat him until his bones are a fine, white mist, he doesn’t know. But he will risk his skeletal system if it means this’ll stop being so damn awkward.

“I’m well aware you told me to shut up,” Gabriel says, holding his hands up in a placating manner. Minos gives him a deadpan glare (or what he assumes is a deadpan glare), but lets him continue. “But I must speak my piece.” He takes a deep breath and resists the urge to pray to a god that no longer exists.

“The father once told us that all sin can be forgiven with a confession and a wave of the hand.” He laughs bitterly. “Now, that's really not true, is it.” It's not a question. He knows the answer.

“No confession will ever right the wrongs that are my actions. No apology of mine will ever be worthy of your ears. I presume you would not want one from me, anyways.”

Minos doesn't dignify him with a response, opting to stare straight ahead.

Gabriel is reminded of his own silent brooding, remembering the warm glow of the campfire while he pondered his questionable morality. After a (not-so) healthy amount of denial, he'd turned to self loathing. How could he have not recognized the council's manipulation sooner? Was he that blind, that moronic to believe their lies? Or was he just too pathetic to form any sort of resistance? What if he was more observant, would he have figured this out earlier and prevented it all from spiraling down to disaster? These questions crowded his mind, like fish in a much-too-small bucket, gasping for air, suffocating each other as they squirm and writhe. The “what ifs” and “if onlys” taunted him with a universe in which he was better, stronger.

How he yearned for someone to battle his thoughts for him, to shut down the paralyzing convictions that plagued his dreams. So maybe what they really need isn’t an apology, just simple reassurance.

“You…are not weak. Far from it.” The words come out awkward and stilted, though he barely needs to think before he speaks. It’s like the syllables have long been ingrained in the deepest parts of his mind, mouth moving to form sounds that have already left his lips.

“You were wronged, and people suffered for it, but it wasn’t your fault. Your strength would not have made a difference, though you harbor more of it than I ever will.”

It's hard to tell what Minos is feeling, half from the fact he lacks a face, and the other half being that Gabriel's people skills are out of practice. In fact, he never had them in the first place. Never had a reason to, if your only purpose is to carry out orders.

“The fact you still stand here today, tragedy after tragedy, is a show of resilience. Though you couldn’t prevent the tragedies in the first place, you did your best to make do with what was left. What’s done is done, Minos.”

He wishes he can take his own advice. Practice what you preach, as they say. Gabriel was never a good preacher, but he tries. He makes sure the other man is listening before delivering his final words.

“You did good.”

Minos says nothing, and for a terrifying moment he thinks he’s made a fatal mistake. And then the man huffs a quiet laugh. Gabriel stares in confusion.

“I…appreciate thy appraisal, but I must admit I’m rather conflicted. On one hand, I understand thou hast merit, but I am reluctant to entertain thy words, due to our history.”

Gabriel lowers his gaze, disappointed he didn’t get through to them, but Minos starts again.

“However, I must thank thee. Thou clearly drew from thy own experience; that shows courage. I shall consider thy appraisal.”

He perks up at that, looking to the king with elation and surprise.

“Just…keep the creature of steel away from this layer. I’m sure thou can surmise why.” He sounds like he’s trying to keep his anger at bay, staring at the floor.

Oh, V1. Yes, he can do that. It did destroy much of what was left of Minos’ kingdom after all, so a permanent ban from the lust layer is more than fair. And that’s not even delving into their battle, the man treating his own defeat as a sign that he’d failed humanity. He shudders at the thought of what Minos would do if he got his hands on them again.

“I understand. I’ll tell them to avoid your city.” It’s Gabriel’s turn to laugh. “Maybe it’ll actually listen to me for once.”

He fixes his eyes on the floor as well, the two sharing a moment of understanding. And then the moment is gone, brief as it is cathartic.

“Sisyphus will accompany thou as I prepare supper. Stay.” Minos goes to open the door…revealing the man in question. Speak of the devil. He has the gall to look smug, bent at the knees to press his ear to the door, the shameless bastard.

“What have I told thee about eavesdropping,” Minos seems unphased, expectant, even.

“Sorry,” But Sisyphus’ grin says otherwise. “I can't help it. Force of habit, I suppose.” The other lets out a rather childish groan.

“I would tell thou to cease thy antics, if not for thy refusal to listen.”

“That's not true. I listened in on your conversation perfectly well.”

“That's…just entertain thy guest.”

“Anything for you, my friend.”

Minos tries to slip past the other, very much ready to leave, but not before Sisyphus catches him with a warm hand on his shoulder. His large frame blocks most of Gabriel's view, but he sees his body lean into theirs. All encompassing, like a solar eclipse. He can't hear what they're saying, so he can only imagine the kindness Sisyphus reserves for friends alone, something he knows he’ll never deserve. He’ll let them have their moment, too.

Once Minos has had enough (said affectionately) with his friend’s fussing, he leaves the two alone in favor of attending to his kingly duties (or whatever that man does in his free time). Sisyphus takes a place at his side, awkwardness not any less prevalent. Time to pull out his award-winning small talk skills again, because that went over so well last time. Believe it or not, Gabriel's smart enough to know that bringing up the king's beheading is a bad idea. The traumatic event is likely still an open wound, for lack of a better term. When would it be appropriate to “get over” your own beheading, anyways? Fourty, fifty years? A hundred? Never? It's not like he's going to get his head back. Alright, now he's just stalling. He needs to come up with a conversation topic quick, because he swears the silence is eating away at his soul. Maybe he can talk about V1; he finds himself doing that often. Not that it means anything.

“...I apologize for my friend's behavior.”

Sisyphus raises a brow.

“You have friends? I never thought you had it in you to be likable.” Oh, so that’s how it’s going to be. Gabriel rolls his eyes, giving an indignant glare. “I do not know who you are referring to. Not many can tolerate your presence.”

“I'm just going to ignore what you said and move on. Look, the machine has said it regrets it's actions-”

“Ah, you mean the child of man.” His mood lifts instantly. “At least you have good taste in company. Our battle ought to be remembered; it was invigorating. I hope to have a rematch someday.” Well, that was very much not the reaction he was expecting.

“You don’t…hate V1? They nearly killed you!”

“Is that its name? I shall honor that, for unlike you,” He shoves a finger in his direction. “it fights with a sense of decency.” Gabriel shrinks under his scrutiny. “How ironic, that a war machine holds more virtue than the supreme angel.” Ouch.

“...That was uncalled for.”

“Was it? It’s not my fault that your lover has better morals than you.”

Time stands still for Gabriel. He feels like he just got shot by the railcannon. There’s no way he heard that right…right?

“I’m sorry, my WHAT?”

“Your lover,” he says, like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. “You two are joined at the hip. It’s nauseating, honestly. Or was your relationship supposed to be a secret?” Gabriel flounders like a fish out of water. This greatly amuses Sisyphus, who’s found his new favorite pastime: pestering a certain archangel.

“I-we are not a couple! I don’t know where you could’ve possibly gleaned that from, but you’re wrong. They are my companion, nothing more.”

“Denial does not look good on you, Gabriel. I thought you were past that.”

“Listen,” he grumbles. “we may be close, but I do not have feelings for the machine!”

“Whatever you say.” He drawls, voice dripping in sarcasm. Sisyphus grins when the other lets out a frustrated groan.

“You-ngh. You are impossible. For the last time, I’m not in love with them. I don't even like them; they're, uh. Sinful and unholy-”

Thud. They whip their heads towards the noise. It sounded like someone kicking open a pair of doors.

“Did…did you hear that?”

“Of course I heard that. Now shut your mouth.” They sit in tense silence. A single beat passes before the quiet is shattered by a thunderous shout.

“CREATURE OF STEEL.”

Oh no. It better not be who he thinks it is. It seems Sisyphus has the same inkling, both slowly turning to give the other a wary look.

“...Is that-”

CRASH.

The wooden wall by the door explodes inward, a blue torpedo rocketing into the room, splinters flying everywhere. Gabriel lets out an undignified shriek. As the dust settles, he can make out a familiar figure lying in the rubble. Shit. It is who he thought it was. At least they seem completely unharmed, despite crashing through a damn wall. It perks up when it sees Gabriel. V1, like the menace it is, waves excitedly. He can’t for the life of him conjure up a single word to say, speechless for the Nth time today. Sisyphus, for one, doesn’t appear phased, greeting them with a hearty chuckle.

“Ah, V1. We were just talking about you. How nice of you to join us.” It would've given him a wave as well, but their friendly conversation is interrupted by a foreboding presence.

“THOU ART NOT WELCOME HERE.” Minos has arrived, and boy is he pissed. He stands in the hole left in the wall, posture stiff and gaze unyielding. The dim, blue-tinged light that once emanated from his form has grown into a blazing, turquoise glow. His heart pumps furiously, veins bulging, visible through his translucent skin.

If Gabriel thought Sisphysus’ wrath was terrifying, Minos’ is nearly enough to make him go into cardiac arrest. Before he can properly process his own terror, the king starts approaching V1, fists ready. Gabriel quickly scrambles to put himself between the two, reacting before his common sense can stop him.

“Don’t!”

Minos glares down at him. Somehow his lack of eyes makes him even more terrifying.

“Please. Spare them.”

The realization sets in that he’s keeping a predator from its prey, and there’s a slight tremble in the arm he shoots out to keep the man at a distance. With a huff, Minos tries to shove past, but the angel shifts to block him. Gabriel sternly shakes his head.

“Move.”

Minos’ voice drips with venom, thick with barely concealed rage. It takes everything within him to stand his ground, anticipating the worst. After all, V1 would do the same for him.

“I will not. Ask. Again.”

Fuck. Gabriel is starting to regret not bringing his swords. He watches helplessly as the other advances, quick steps with murderous intent. He tenses his muscles, steadies his breath, and prepares for a jaw shattering punch…but is instead met with a voice, low and understanding.

“Minos. Think about what you are doing.”

Gabriel locks eyes with his unlikely savior. Sisyphus is the picture of neutrality, brow set in careful analysis. He's well aware of the fragility of the situation; Minos looks like he’s just about to go off the deep end. And while he has good reason to loathe, Sisyphus knows he'll regret lashing out. His conscience always comes back to haunt him, the damn thing. As much as he'd like to see the two mashed into a red paste, Minos doesn't need another thing to lament over. He can’t say he’s looking forward to defending the duo, suddenly reminded of what provoked such an intense response. He scolds himself for starting to actually get along with Gabriel, nearly forgetting the horrors he unleashed upon his greatest friend. Sisyphus schools his expression, trying not to let his own anger show.

“Your people, they look up to you for your compassion and empathy. Where is that mercy now?”

There's a near unperceptive tremor that wracks his friend's tense frame. Good. He's getting through to him.

“The beings before you did what they needed to survive. While their actions had dire repercussions, and I am not absolving them of fault here, consider their circumstances.”

Minos doesn't want to. He doesn't want to humanize them any further. He wants to tear them apart like they did humanity, unhindered by stupid morals.

“Would one blame a trout for thrashing when caught? Would one scorn a wolf for killing to eat?”

A thick, black liquid starts to ooze out of Minos’ abyss-like face. It flows like tar, ugly and coagulated with sorrow and feelings he'd hate to dissect. In the hollow silence that swallows the room, they can hear his breath hitch.

“Gabriel,” Sisyphus says, fixing him with a piercing stare. The angel stares with wide eyes, not expecting to have been brought into the conversation. “You were a weapon wielded by another, neglected and abused. When you inevitably faltered, you were discarded like a rag.”

Gabriel lowers his gaze. He hates that they're right.

“The sins you committed were the result of eons of manipulation and torture. When you finally realized what you'd done, you took immediate action to correct your mistakes with the little time you had left.”

The angel in question is stunned into silence. Truly, what more could he have possibly done in his situation? With only one day to right his wrongs, it’d be futile to reason with the council; killing them was the sole solution. As for the sins of his past, perhaps all the blame does not fall on him. It was the council’s abuse that forced him to carry out their word, conditioned to be unquestioningly loyal to the point of blind faith. While he was the one to strike innocents down, the blood is also on their hands. An ancient weight is halved, lifted from his shoulders, no longer unbearable. A sliver of forgiveness, not from another, but for himself: a gift he never expected Sisyphus of all people to bestow upon him. He would’ve expressed his gratitude if not for the sudden shift in subject, mourning the chance to thank his unlikely advocate.

“V1,” the machine perks up at the mention of its name. “You were created to kill and survive, and you did just that. After the threat of death had passed, you opted to explore beyond your nature. If passivity was an option, you took it.”

They do little more than tilt their head in consideration. They’re a bit hard to read on the count of not having a face, so he can only speculate if it's having a similarly Earth-shattering revelation like his.

“You defied your creator’s wildest expectations. Yes, you are violent, and ruthless, and efficient, but you are more than just that. I see flair in the way you fight, confidence in your skills, and a desire to succeed. You are so much more than the actions you did in order to survive.” He lets a beat of silence pass for the information to sink in before addressing the man of the moment.

“Minos, listen to me.” The king doesn't turn to face him, but he's known him long enough to tell he’s hearing every word. “You are a just ruler who took the time to care for each of your denizens, and you have every right to be angry that they met an untimely death. You did not deserve your fate, and neither did they. And neither did V1 and Gabriel. We are all victims of circumstance.”

Minos’ fists shake, clenching and unclenching. Everything sounds like it's underwater, words garbled and distorted, yet frustratingly coherent. He wants to plug his ears and scream until he suffocates, anything to get Sisyphus’ voice out of his head. He wants to destroy everything and everyone, until there is nothing left, and then destroy himself too. For once, he just wants revenge, not resolution. It’s not like he can ever get his people back, anyways. Clench. Unclench. Clench. Unclench.

“The only thing we can do now is to live on. Stand down, Minos. Is this what your people would've wanted?”

Something in him snaps, and the fight leaves him all at once. It’s not. It’s not what they would’ve wanted; how deplorable it would be to kill in their memory. Wordlessly, he rushes out of the room. Sisyphus holds out an arm to stop the other two from following.

“No. Give him time.”

The air is plunged into silence once again. Gabriel dares to break it, eager to give thanks.

“I-thank you. We truly appreciate-”

“Don't. Just-” Sisyphus sighs, shaking his head. “don't. I didn't do this for you.”

“...”

“We will meet by the castle entrance when the sun starts to set for your departure. Do not follow me.”

“...I understand.”

Wow. A bit harsh. Regardless, he's still grateful for this new perspective, if not a tad disappointed. Sisyphus rises from his chair and heads toward the door, steps stiff yet dutiful. Lost in thought, it takes Gabriel a moment to notice the king hasn't actually left the room yet, lingering with his back turned.

“The suffering you’ve brought my dear friend is beyond cruel. For that, my forgiveness is withheld, but my words hold true. Do with that what you will.” He finally exits, figure slipping through the door.

Huh. The pseudo-approval of Sisyphus feels…nice. It’s easy for him to get lost in his own sense of accomplishment. Gabriel feels a hand rest upon his. He snaps out of his trance, eyes trailing up its arm to see the machine sitting beside him, staring ahead. There's an awkwardly long pause before V1 has the courage to speak up.

Its hands move in quick, stilted gestures, conveying aggression in its urgency. Oh, they’re angry, he realizes, cringing in anticipation. He’s had more than enough action for today, thank you very much.

What are you doing here?!

“Me? I-uh,” Gabriel scrambles for an excuse. “I was just visiting lust for a chat with a couple old friends, but um. We had a little disagreement.”

The machine raises a single brow. Or they would’ve, but making fully-functional robotic eyebrows was apparently not one of their creator’s priorities. Shame.

Right. It looks like you three had an absolute ball.

The angel grimaces.

“Alright, fine. I came here to apologize for my actions.” He huffs. “And clearly, it didn’t exactly go to plan,” gesturing to the bruises that still litter his torso.

No shit. And without your armor, too. What, were you trying to get yourself killed?

“W-well, when have you ever cared about my wellbeing?” Gabriel growls, suddenly standing to his full height. “Even if you do, I’m just a bloodbag to you. You only care about your own survival. You always have.” V1 narrows their optic.

You don’t mean that.

“What if I do? And what if I was trying to kill myself?!” He shouts, picking up the nearest chair and chucking it across the room. It isn’t until its splintered remains settle on the floor that he regains his composure, kneeling on the ground, visibly deflating.

“I should’ve died after those twenty-four hours were up. I should’ve.” He whispers. He sounds so frail, a startling divergence from his usual bravado. Cold metal makes contact with his shoulder. He turns sluggishly to V1, if only to “hear” what they have to say.

I-

Its movements falter momentarily.

I do care about you. And I always have.

They don’t meet his eyes, but he still desperately clings to the hope that it’s speaking truthfully.

“I…I need some air.”

Gabriel speeds toward the balcony, the machine following suit. He takes a seat on the banister, gaze facing forward as V1 does the same. They both stare at the blazing horizon for a while, until V1 can’t take the silence any longer.

You make me dissatisfied with existence, it blurts out, signing almost incomprehensibly fast.

Gabriel blinks. How to respond to that, he does not know.

“I…thanks? I guess?”

It frantically waves its hands, trying to show it means no ill will.

I mean, you make me want more out of life.

It was never allowed to enjoy things; It never had the chance. But now, they spar for the heck of it, not over sustenance or resources. It takes the time to manually read books instead of scanning them, something they once considered a mere waste of fuel. It ignores the alerts that flood its vision, closing them before they have the chance to tell it that it's being “inefficient.” Text irrelevant its ass. Before Gabriel, they were just surviving. Now, they live.

Gabriel can't help but smile. They said so little, but they needn’t say more. He knows what they're feeling all too well. It takes a bit of effort to muster up the courage, but the machine’s honesty spurs him on, and he manages to find his words.

“I think I understand. You taught me to…want. And by the heavens, I wanted to live, I wanted to fight and struggle and fail, to laugh and cry and watch the sunset a million times over just to say that I did. When my light was taken away, it was you who gave me clarity, and for that…I cannot thank you enough.”

He leans a bit closer, just reveling in the comfortable silence they've created. V1 scoots over, closing the distance between them. The cool metal feels nice against his skin.

I think he's right.

“About what?”

Only thing we can do now is keep living, despite-no, with the guilt.

“...How?” The question of “why” goes unasked.

Not sure. But we're still alive, so we've got to be doing something right.

“...I suppose you have a point.”

Perhaps those questions can be answered another time. Right now, all that seems to matter is the gentle breeze that passes through the cracks in his armor and the feeling of the machine's plating against his shoulder. His heart swells as they bask in the “sun's” rays. Considering they're in literal hell, that glowing ball is no star, but whatever it is shall suffice. They’ll make do, as they always. A ray of light falls upon the pair, encasing them in warmth. How picturesque. Two beings at the end of time, watching the sun set as it slips below the horizon.

…Hold on.

Aren't they supposed to be heading somewhere right now? Oh. Oh. Sisyphus is expecting them.

“Shit. We need to go, now.” He snatches V1's hand and bolts for the door. Heart to heart be damned, they have a deadline to meet.

Maybe Gabriel's previous difficulty navigating the palace was procrastination after all. It's remarkably easy to traverse, especially with his head clear and V1 helping guide him. He supposes everything feels a little easier with a clear head, and they find the castle gate in record time. The prime souls are already waiting there, punctual as expected.

As the two pairs face each other in the doorway, Gabriel notices Minos’ glazed look, Sisphysus’ hand resting on his shoulder. He follows the king’s stare, his eyes landing on the city below.. Before he has time to wallow in shame, Minos’ gaze drifts back to him. Silence. Introspection. After an excruciatingly long lapse in conversation, Minos sighs.

“I bid thee farewell. May thy travels be uneventful.” He senses the sincerity in his voice, and it's honestly relieving. The fact they can even speak to him without hatred oozing from their words leaves him dumbfounded. And it’s not forgiveness, most definitely not, but it’s something. After the atrocities he’s committed, Gabriel is endlessly grateful for this morsel of absolution. The corners of his lips turn upwards as he bows his head in gratitude. His core blooms with warmth.

Ever impatient, V1 halts their respectful exchange by tapping him twice on the shoulder, metal meeting flesh. It raises its hands to sign. Home? It asks. Gabriel huffs fondly, rolling his eyes.

“Yes, yes. We’re going home.” He pivots to the kings. “Thank you very much, truly, but we must get going. This one,” gesturing to V1. “is getting restless. And should also learn some manners.” That earns him a flick to the helmet. He swears he hears Sisyphus stifle a chuckle.

Resisting the urge to bicker, Gabriel turns away, guiding V1 into his hold. With a flap of the wings and a powerful thrust from his legs, they take to the sky. Every beat takes them higher and higher, and further and further from Lust. He doesn’t look back, just focuses on keeping V1 from slipping out of his arms.

His stamina isn’t as infinite as when he still had his light, so by the time they reach the surface, Gabriel is exhausted. They decide to call it a night and rest where they land. He sets up a campfire, not unlike the aftermath of his second defeat, but now with kinder circumstances. It’s nice having someone beside him, even if they are a bit of a pest.

“You're a nuisance, you know.”

The machine gives a cheeky thumbs up. Gabriel heaves a heavy sigh, and for the first time in eons, he feels light. His burdens do not sag and tug at his heart, and the gnawing guilt he harbors has lost its bite. He laughs, pulling V1 in, sheltering them with his wings. Joyous and content, Gabriel gives in to the lulling effect of the setting sun. As sleep pulls him under, he dreams of a hopeful future, not of tongues and teeth.

And though the sight of the lust layer still fills him with regret, the weight on his shoulders is a bit easier to carry. Gabriel may never be able to cry life back into the townsfolk, nor grieve them back from death, but he’s made an effort to make amends. It's a long way forward, yet it's a step in the right direction. These days, the shame doesn't linger and fester like it used to. It's been replaced with a fire that burns bright and unyielding. Gabriel decides he likes his newfound vigor.

And oh, how it suits him to feel strong.

Leave a reply telling me your thoughts if you'd like. :) I appreciate any and all replies lol. And yes, the last line is a reference to the dodie song "Ready now" hehe

[decamarks]

i bought ultrakill forever ago but never got around to playing it. what is the deal why has it spawned such a dedicated fanbase. you seem like you'd know....

IT'S JUST REALLY GODDAMN FUN!!! that's the short answer and honestly the best answer. it's really ridiculously fun. like probably one of the most fun games to ever exist.

there is a ridiculous amount of care and skill and soul packed into every design choice; it culminates in some of the most immaculately ecstatic and visceral gameplay i've ever experienced. it cannot be understated how brilliant this game's design is. the only way to really understand why it excels is to just play it!

if you'd like an anecdote to represent the overall ultrakill experience, here's mine: when i played the demo for the first time, after maybe 5 minutes i became so physically nauseous that i had to stop. and in that time i immediately went to get the full game. it's DELIGHTFUL. (see also: jerma's playthrough where he starts screaming "humans aren't supposed to be doing this" during a boss fight.)

but even aside from pure gameplay, there really is a lot to love… there's a certain self-aware sincerity to everything. it's unabashed on purpose, and in the best ways possible. despite its obviously absurd violence, don't at all mistake ultrakill for something cynical or misanthropic—there's a lot of depth and heart dancing beneath the surface, a lot of it in places i didn't expect to see it, and so much that i didn't expect to appreciate nearly as much as i do.

[okay this got too long. the rest is going DOWN HERE ↓]

like okay, obviously the music is just. insane. the goddamn midi metal/breakcore genre fusion is THE most hilarious and unfathomably genius stylistic choice that could have been made. and it's not even just that!! there's ambient & drone & harsh noise influence all across the ost, which just enchants and delights me. i DEFINITELY didn't expect it, but i love it. (the fact that there's like, a level named after a sunn o))) song, and that the latest update contains a godawful joke about trout mask replica might tell you exactly what kind of game ultrakill is, or it might tell you literally nothing.)

the writing and worldbuilding can be rich and compassionate in ways i really didn't expect, too... it's so evident that it's a work of passion, with really sincere and often sweet philosophies sprinkled throughout all the bloodshed and grotesque silliness—and often within them. it makes me smile! also gabriel is a really good character. people go apeshit over that guy. for good reason. he's just REALLY good.

if you're just interested in understanding its amassed fanbase, yeah ultrakill's is pretty ridiculous and dedicated. and it's extremely deserved! the game is fun & the characters are fun. being in early access, it's kinda built on ongoing feedback, so it makes sense people are invested. the devs really seem to embrace the fanbase wholeheartedly, which helps a lot too. that is also why, kind of inexplicably, ultrakill is kind of a gay & horny game. please note that i do not say these things flippantly or lacking deliberation; there's an extremely good essay to be written about gayness across ultrakill & its communities. like aside from the general hilarity of a game having official buttplug support, the fact that the dev team hired an artist specifically because he drew a lot of incredibly beautiful/obscene depictions of gabriel DOES say a lot. this, of course, makes ultrakill 100x better.

anyway that's the basics. i could definitely write THOUSANDS of words about this game and that's honestly... not what i expected when i booted it up the first time LOL. it really just happened to appeal to a lot of things i sincerely adore, in an unexpectedly sincere way—all while being a STUPIDLY good game.

TL;DR: it's a fun robot video game where you shoot things. and there's blood and explosions. it's good you should play it

[heiilari]

🚩

Rpc hot takes/ accepting

The hate on original characters. Now originally this was going to be one specific topic but I'm gonna pop off

I really hate that people throw so many assumptions about ocs when 9/10 chances they didn't even READ the character bio

I get people have had bad experiences with some ocs but it doesn't mean every single oc is going to be a carbon copy of that person (or persons) character!

Like every oc writer makes their own lore , hell some make their own worlds too and make it open for people to interact with

And to be thrown into a category is upright hurtful and kinda a piss off?

Like you can tell by looking at posts and such if they're around for just horny and ships or if they're around to make plots , friendships, etc etc

Were in 2024 the oc hate really needs to simmer the fuck down.

Not every oc is related to a canon character or in a relationship with one by default

Not every oc is uwu cute or horny

Not every oc just wants to pounce on coochie or dick

Not every oc is just looking for ships

Stop assuming every oc is!!

Read character bios! If you want someone to read your characters bio then you better have the same respect and mindset. No , nobody is expecting anyone to remember every single detail but just read the bios yall

Which also brings if a oc is connected to a canon muse sometimes they have a specific blog / person and state that it isn't every copy of the canon character! ( eg my OC kiiva is connected only to Miasmas Gabriel ( from ultrakill) ONLY because we made a plot!)

Also people tend to forget that canon characters are just someone else's oc that went through 10000 rewrites and became popular.

Also can we please for the love of fuck stop assuming every single female oc just wants to date a canon character or have their babies ? And even if they are doing that it isn't your muse so use the blacklist tag if it bothers you so much

Sorry I really had to pop off about this

Ocs don't deserve the hate they get tbh

A lot of us just genuinely wanna make stories and have fun too and being categorized is kinda...shitty it's like categorizing canons. No one would like it if we categorized canons sooo why is it okay to do it to ocs???

[justagreencircle]

heyyyyy~

how the fuck do you make a good pinned post

so uhh

fandoms amirite

Outer Wilds (And the DLC)

UNDERTALE/deltarune

ULTRAKILL (bad at game)

Hollow Knight (not far in at all but lore is so cool)

Rain World

Persona (not the first 2 since i lost my ps2 and emulators just break for me i guess)

Voltron: Legendary Defenders

The Owl House

She-ra, Princesses of Power

Arcane

minecraft (LITERALLY ONLY MODS)

The Legend of Zelda (not tokt, i personally think its overrated)

Class of '09

Guilty Gear Strive

Hollow Knight

Portal/Portal 2

Terraria

JJBA (im on part 6 so far)

Evangelion (Watched the show & the movie)

Anything else i find (hyperfixate on)

blorbos :)

kotone shiomi, p3p (babygirl)

futaba sakura, p5 (literally me frfr)

queen deltarune (tumblr sexywoman)

rivulet, rain world (scrunkly)

pidge gunderson/katie holt, voltron (also literally me)

jinx, arcane (little meow meow)

gabriel, ultrakill (MACHINE)

ari, class of 09 (she deserved better)

brisket basket blanket bridget, guilty gear (THE TOOOOOOWWNN)

btw im australian, meaning im online at weird times so just ignore that

[im-about-to-lose-it-i-am-done]

It still hurts

Why did I do it on my left forearm it’s so visible

This was a mistake

But the anger and the hate makes me want to do it more.

I will not. I am above this. I am better than this.

I will not burden a soul. This is my cross to carry.

Mine, and mine alone.

I will not give in.

I won’t

But it

It feels so bad and shameful and disgusting

But it feels so good

The thought of doing it again both warms and chills my chest

I shouldn’t

I should

I don’t deserve this.

I do.

God. What would my friends think?

They wouldn’t even know. Nobody bothered to ask further in that one server. You are an annoyance.

Vile little thing.

Gabriel Ultrakill is the thing keeping me grounded right now

The mind is willing, but the body must rest, lest you squander one of the lord’s creations.

What a joke. I don’t even believe in god.

Im just clinging to my own delusions.

How utterly pathetic

[20percentbug]

Question for the ask game for gaymers like you:

3. Favorite boss?

4. Best game soundtrack (full album or single track)?

5. Most memorable gaming moment?

14. Worst game you’ve ever played?

18. A game you started, but never finished.

19. A game that you wish you could play for the first time again.

20. A game that made you cry.

21. A game you thought you wouldn’t like, but ended up loving?

23. Do you typically choose to play a male or female character (when asked to pick)?

29. Favorite childhood game?

33. Most embarrassing gaming moment.

34. Funniest gaming moment.

35. Do you own any gaming themed memorabilia? (e.g. collector’s editions, posters, prop replicas, statues, clothing, etc.)

38. An unpopular gaming opinion you have.

40. Best game cover art.

And a bonus question:

41. Favorite licensed game?

3. there are a lot of good video game bosses but by far my favorite out of em has been gabriel from ULTRAKILL recently. gay angelic man :)

4. by far, the entirety of the NieR series has absolutely gorgeous music. Bipolar Nightmare, Song of the Ancients, i could go on and on. it's very good

5. the end sequence of ending C in NieR:Automata did SO many things to me. oh my god. 9S deserves way better he did not deserve what he got throughout the game

14. i'm lucky that i'm really really picky, but unfortunately i was in the bitlife rabbit hole for a little bit. that game is fucking infested and i don't like it

18. i wanna finish patapon 2. it's. really fun :)

19. is it fair if i have multiple? ah, fuck it. NieR:Automata, Hollow Knight, Bug Fables, Rain World, Purrgatory, Celeste, Night In The Woods, and ULTRAKILL are all games i want to experience for the first time again

20. there are a few. Purrgatory is one of them

21. Titanfall 2. i was kinda expecting a mediocre experience but the movement was amazing, plotline was enjoyable, and BT stole my heart. it's a good game

23. male...? honestly tho i've been going with feminine features for games that let me customize and other than that i'm probably gonna start playing as female characters more often. call me trans or whatever i dunno lol

29. ooooh. remember metroid bounty hunters? that was a really fun game

33. whenever i do very dumb stuff that people mistake for as me flirting. there was one particular moment was while i was playing sky: children of the light

34. tf2 ragdolls in general

35. i got three pikachu plushies, hollow knight plushies, and hollow knight keychain accessories

38. i do not know which of my gaming opinions are bad but i think that modding in general, while it can be enjoyable - hilarious, even - will often subtract from the core gameplay loop, and therefore subtract from how much you can get out of the game.

there are some exceptions to this though; rimworld is a prime example of a game being kept fresh by the modding community, and tf2 is honestly just a fucking mess in general; somewhat modding it is what makes a lot of the things in the game work as intended

40. i gotta give it to Rain World for it's kickass cover art

bonus: 41. baldur's gate. i think it's licensed? wizards of the coast helped publish it

[luxlightly]

Forgive my lack of drawing skills, but I heard this song and desperately wanted to make something for it for Ultrakill. I also had to really squash the first image to get it to encode at a reasonable size. Song is "O Superman (For Massenet)" by Laurie Anderson and it's a fantastic Ultrakill song in general and I highly recommend listening to it.

The first part is Gabriel showing up to kill Minos during the Lust Renaissance. The second is the Council punishing Gabriel after his first lost against V1. The third is a severed head of a Council member during the second epilogue when Gabriel kills the council. The last one is supposed to be God, depicted as a blinding light and two glowing, outstretched hands. As with all of my art, if anyone else ever wants to take a crack at making a better version of the same idea, it's always allowed. Lord knows the idea and the song deserve better than what I can make.

[tillman]

tillman its time for your monthly death threat <3 if you dont post about ultrakill in the next 24 hours im coming to your house with a big baseball bat full of nails okay. (guy whos seen someone play like halfway through whats out of ultrakill)

Its about love its about hate its about how those are at the root the same expression of an unending passion its about duty and purpose and finding hope in a world that doesn't care for you and has no true meaning at its root. its about if nihilism is really worth it its a question if certain philosophies matter at all in our busy lives its about futility and despair and life in the face of death. its about selfhood and being true to yourself despite the structures in charge that make that impossible. its a question of Dante's reflection of society. its about mythologizing and aggrandizing and desperate struggles to keep power.

its at its root a love story between two people who have lost their guiding force and making their own purpose despite "humanity/god is dead"

The lore of it is really interesting and told through small terminal entries throughout the game and its secret levels but it genuinely all boils down to "god is dead. god has deemed humanity a failure and has left. what happens." sure there is the great war, but its just set dressing. humanity wiped itself out in war, shocker. humanity built weapons of destruction that run on blood and can rebuild themselves forever. ok. humanity found the entrance to hell and attempted to explore it while they were still alive.

none of this really matters its not a story about that. you do get the humanity of minos and sisyphus trying to struggle against the harsh rule of heaven to create something better for the people forced to hell who didnt deserve it. you get the ferryman finding solace in a looping hologram and finding hope through religion (even if, in context, its a little funning knowing the religion is based off a man who is deeply flawed and questioning his own connection to god). you get the humanity of the different robots, swordsmachine and the mindflayers fighting to make themselves how they want to be viewed, v2s complex born from meeting its progenitor, etc. hell the true main character of the game is gabriel. you spend more time understanding his point of view and how he was led to this path and how he genuinely cares and wants to help than you get anything out of v1.

its also. above this. the best movement based boomer shooter ever made. its fun. its fast. the guns are all satisfying and combos feel insane to do.

and above all of this. the gameplay the music the lore.

its got this thing